Perspective

Hiding something from your spouse (part 2)

“Whither shall I go from thy spirit? Or wither shall I flee from thy presence? If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there. If I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there. If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea; Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me. If I say, surely, the darkness shall cover me, even the night shall be light about me.

Yea, the darkness hideth not from there, but the light shineth as the day. The darkness and the light are both alike to thee. For thou hast possessed my reigns; thou hast covered me in my mother’s womb” (Psalm 139: 7-13). You are hiding your actual salary or income from your husband or wife and even lying about your resources.

Apart from the fact that what you think is a secret is open before God, you may end up enriching some bank officers somewhere. There have been cases of a wealthy person passing away. None of his or her family members is aware of how much he or she has in the bank account or about the existence of such account.

He didn’t write a WILL because he trusted no lady, including his wife. If he fails to show up at his bank after some time, the bank officials proceed to confirm his demise. After that, the money is gone. Sometimes, the widow and children of a late rich man end up struggling to feed. What can be more foolish as a man’s conduct than this? As a married woman, your male colleague is stalking or even sexually harassing you in your office. You are not informing your husband. Then, he is calling you at ungodly hours when you are with your husband.

Now, here you are in a position to start defending or apologizing for a sin you did not commit. Don’t hide anything from your spouse. This is also applicable to a man that is being harassed by a female colleague. Sharing this information is not so that your spouse can take any action.

It is simply to keep your spouse informed, to avoid cracks in the wall of trust. Your house help or your wife’s relative that she brought into the house, is trying to lure you to have an illicit affair with her. Instead of informing your wife or taking a decision to frustrate the devil’s plans, you are counting it as a privilege. Maybe you are even having sex with her over and over again and assuming all is well. “If I say, surely, the darkness shall cover me, even the night shall be light about me.” My dear, you have become God’s enemy.

You need to repent from your sins of sexual immorality and reconcile your relationship with God. In fact, in any relationship where a third party says to you “Don’t tell your husband” or “Don’t tell your wife,” you will be opening the devil’s access to your marriage by yielding to such advice.

There was the case of a woman, who had only one son. She paid a visit to the son in the city, bringing with her, a fetish substance from the hinterland. She gave it to her son’s wife. She instructed her to apply it to her son’s food, saying that the substance was meant to protect her son from evil.

She commanded the lady not to inform her son. The foolish lady obeyed her mother-in-law, believing that the measure was for the good of her husband. For several months after eating that food, her husband, who was a Christian, had sleepless nights, fighting spiritual battles. After the innocent man’s deliverance,the woman paid a second visit with another concoction and gave the same instruction to his wife. This time, the latter could not muster the courage to obey her again. She confessed to her husband and the man.

The husband, who knew the implication of the substance, explained to his wife that the second experience would have led to his untimely death if she had applied it in his food again. Thank God the man was a Christian. That home would have been broken or destroyed because of “don’t tell your husband.” A wealthy strange woman is showing some magnanimity somewhere by providing financial relief to you to take care of your family, pending when you get a job or recover from your financial challenge. Your wife must be aware of such relationship. If you hide it from her, you create room for discord. As a matter of fact, visits to such a person must not be made alone. Every physical meeting should feature your wife’s presence. Subjects of discussion at every point of conversation should be known to your wife. If the woman expresses displeasure at your wife’s presence or involvement, then, there are strings attached to such charity. Stop hiding things from your spouse to avoid the unimaginable negative consequences that many have suffered in the past for doing so. Be open to your spouse. Be naked to him or her, and your marriage shall be a blessing and a testimony in Jesus name.

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